Be in your place

I have learned a lot about submission and the woman's place ever since I began following the Lord, but know I have so far to go. For any who have followed my posts over the years I'm sure you have noticed the changes, or maybe you have not. Whatever the case, I have and I am thankful to the Lord for his mercy and patience. I am also thankful for his grace that continues to shape and refine me. He will do the same for you too... IF you want him to ... but you must have a sincere desire to be in your God-given place.

When I first started following the Lord I was so excited to be free from the sins I was living in. Yes, I had to forsake the sin, but when I finally decided to do that there was such a light feeling ... a release from the bondage I was in. I was hyped up and ready to share truths with anyone who would listen - because surely they wanted to hear, right? Among other things, this blog was certainly one place where I could share the truths I saw in the scriptures.

Over the years I began to learn the true place of a woman, and it's certainly not out in public preaching to any and all who will hear / read / listen. The scriptures are so clear: we are to be in submission to our head, be it our husband, father, pastor, etc. A woman without a head is out of order, plain and simple. A woman who is not in proper submission is not right with the Lord.

It is NOT our place to be in the public view teaching things that are for men to teach. Yes, we may share truths pertaining specifically to women, but we may never try to convince a woman of truths beyond those basic things. What things? Conveniently, we have somewhat of a list in Titus 2:

³ The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;
⁴ That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,
⁵ To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

We must first be an example. We cannot teach these things if we do not live them ourselves. Our actions speak so much louder than our words. 

I realize there are a lot of posts on my blog that are NOT in line with what a woman ought to be sharing with other women. Several months ago (or a year already? I don't know) I seriously considered deleting them all, however after some counsel from brothers I deleted some but left many. I appreciate seeing them there as a reminder of where I have come from and how far I have yet to go.

Women getting together in groups is very dangerous. How often have women gathered together, talked about doctrines or other spiritual matters beyond what is their proper place and little seeds been planted which cause one woman or another (or many) to go against what their husbands believe? If this is you, you could be fostering their rebellion!  The easiest thing we could do is just avoid these situations all together. Do not allow yourself to be in a group of women who are talking doctrine and such. If it comes up, simply walk away; leave the conversation. If there is an opportunity, try to change the subject to something fitting for women. If it seems necessary, find a way to humbly share that the group conversation is stepping where it should not be stepping. Sincere lovers of the truth will appreciate knowing they are stepping in to an area that is not pleasing to the Lord or their heads.

There are countless numbers of women, all righteous in their own eyes, who see nothing wrong with stepping above their husbands and doing their own thing because they see something in the scriptures that their husband does not. This puts the woman above her man, making her the head instead of him. But what does the bible say?

1 Corinthians 11:3 But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ.

In several places we are told to submit to our husbands [or head]. We are even told in 1 Peter 3 that we can actually win our disobedient husbands to the truth by our actions alone (no words needed). The key is: submission and being meek, quiet, chaste. These are the things we must be focused on. We could have all of our doctrines and theologies correct but if we are not in our proper place none of our beliefs will matter. The Lord is looking for a meek and quiet woman. He says this is what is of great value to him. 

An example would be: maybe you meet a woman that is not covering her head. Do not automatically assume she is going against the bible; it could just be that it is her heart's desire to cover her head but her husband believes it is not necessary. If you try to convince her to cover her head contrary to what her husband believes and desires for HIS wife, then you are encouraging her to be rebellious against her husband. That is his wife, not yours. It is always safe and pleasing to the Lord to encourage women to be in their place.

Not too long ago I was visiting 'back home' and a woman asked me why I dressed the way I was dressed. This led in to her asking more about my testimony and then she said, "So do you believe ______?" The subject of her question does not matter. The point is, she wanted to talk doctrine and it was a particular belief that I hold and my 'head' does not. This brought up a wonderful opportunity to speak to her about submission - a much more fitting subject for women to be talking about and encouraging each other in. 

We must be careful! To say anything contrary against our 'head' is probably the most disrespectful thing we could do. God hates this! And you will be judged by it if you do not repent. Regardless of whether you agree with him or not, he is your head and you are his helper. Your job is to help him be the man God wants him to be. You be the women God wants you to be by being in your proper place. Do not dishonor him. Lift him up!

Let us encourage married women to submit to their husbands, single women still at home to submit to their fathers, and single women on their own to submit to their elder / pastor.